So there you have it. I could just end the story with that pic and the title because we all already know that about Facebook (and Twitter)
But anyway, this story over on TechCrunch posted yesterday basically explains that you may soon have the option to “highlight” your Facebook posts for a small $2.00 fee.
My first thought was “who the fuck would pay to highlight a post?!?!” Of course I quickly realized that most of you are morons and think every damn picture, stupid quote, unoriginal thought, etc, you re-post shows me that you think you are funnier, more sensitive, and thought provoking than you really are. Of course Facebook is nothing more than a “Hey LOOK AT ME!” place so fuck it, why not make a few bucks from people posting “hey I need a golden chicken for my farm”, “can you please check out my Amway products” which I guess if it’s important to you I can see the draw to such a service. What we all know is going to happen though is some skank “highlighting” her wanna-be sexy photos, people “highlighting” their messages to dead people and THE WORST PART is going to be when they “highlight” some stupid fuckin picture that’s been posted by hundreds of thousands of times already.
Now I make no secret that I like to “poke the bear with a stick”. I intentionally play devils advocate, a douce, prove you wrong or even better just say shit to intentionally get a rise out of people. Most of the time people don’t even get the humor. And ya know what? I don’t give a fuck. That’s what I do. Have all my life. Now I just have a forum where millions of people have access to it 24/7. So what’s the point you ask?? Well I think I can afford an extra $10 or $20 bucks a week and highlight some of the most moronic posts I can think of. Yeah, go ahead, “sort by most recent” and my little $2.00 post is going to fuck that right up for you. Though as quickly as my “flood the feed Friday” got shut down by a good friend saying “That’s probably the quickest way to get unfriended or unsubscribed from” (yeah I forgot about that part) this will probably go down in flames as well. But hey it’s fun to think for $2.00 I could piss off some people who haven’t blocked me yet.
In a place that’s overrun with all the likes your moronic friends like, advertisements, useless information, pre-posts, shares and only a handful of revenant posts a day why the hell not right?
So for all you people waiting for a kidney or have that important birthday wish to a dead relative check it out. It’s rolled out already for some users. We know nothing says “hey look at how important I am” then a highlighted message. 
This is great!!! When I finally get laid, I’m going to pay $2 so EVERYONE knows! Of course that will be on top of the $100 I had to pay her in the first place
LMAO!
I can’t get past WHY would I pay to highlight some shit on FB?? Really? OMG scary thing is you know people will do it. Everything I say is already incredibly profound, I don’t need highlighting!