So against my better conservative judgment I watched the movie Food Inc. the other day. Well the picture above is from the movie. If you can’t figure it out it’s the different in sizes between chickens back in the day and chickens today. Now if you remember I posted this post about “boneless chicken wings” If you didn’t read it click the link and come back here.
Ok did ya read it? Prob not because you are just as bad at following directions as I am. Anyway all you “boneless wing” people are to blame for this. Because of you and your obsession with bland white meat ‘wings” you have caused us to have fucked up Arnold Schwarzenegger Terminator chickens. These things are so big and have such big breasts they can’t even take more than two or three steps. From you the picture you can’t really tell but these things are all breast. Everything else is the same size (like my REAL wings) Listen I like wings so unless they create a super chicken with more than two wings I will sleep easy tonight knowing that I haven’t changed the biology of a chicken due to my obsessive need for more shitty breast meat “wings”. Now I know someone going to say “yeah but wings have gotten bigger over the years also”, well I don’t like the big wings either so shut your mouth hippy. I like the smaller ones. Always have. I don’t want my buffalo drumstick the size of a turkey drumstick, if I did I would have buffalo turkey wings.
So I wanted to let all you children who still order “boneless wings” as an adult you have fucked up our chicken ecosystem (I know there is no chicken ecosystem but it sounded smart, basically you fucked up our chickens!) Man up eat the meat off a bone like a real man and not some little fag who doesn’t want to get his bitchy little hands dirty. Boneless wings STILL SUCK